plaidbstrd (plaidbstrd) wrote in boys_and_girls,

48 days and counting

hey there internet, this is my first official blog, so here it goes........
I'm currently in a relationship with a woman who i thought was amazing in the beginning. she was spontaneous, outgoing, fun to be around, caring and always was down for a roll in the sheets when the oppourtunity was presented. the problem i have since run into as the title of this entry suggests, for the past 48 days we have not had sex or been intimate in any vague way. I didnt think too much of it in the first few days and weeks, her "cycle" was an obvious deterrent and the holidays were approaching so we were both pretty busy. As the time past and school was done for the winter break and things were calming a little bit before the hectic christmas season really got into spring i began to wonder why we hadn't gotten to spend the alone time that we used to share frequently together. Again i let it slide passing it off in my head as just a bump on the road of life in this relationship, however since the holiday season i have not been fortunate enough as to recieve a sign of affection other than when i initiate the act, not a kiss, not a hug. I began thinking to myself, am i asking too much? Is there something that I am doing wrong that isn't providing her libido with the proper stimulation that a woman needs in order to be "in the mood" as they say? I then decided foolishly to confront my significant other on the subject.....well let me tell you was that a big mistake or what! I was not unconvince that she could have been unfaithful to me, however as a past trasngressor of the same act, I am prone to be a little more paranoid than the next person due to my knowledge of how easy it is to perform an unfaithful act, but i digress.....When I confronted her she was outraged that I would even consider that she was unfaithful and that just because we were not having sex didn't mean she was off sleeping with other people. So yet again i was stuck between a rock and a hard place, what do i do? I then asked her why she wasnt feeling "in the mood" and i was given the runaround of "oh well you know im busy with all my school stuff and i've just been feeling unhappy recently with myself" yada yada yada you know how it goes....So i resigned myself to push the matter aside in my head though i was beginning to lose some semblance of sanity having gone from having sex on a most frequent basis to being completely cut-off for nearing a month. But the blessed holiday season had yet another blow to bestow upon me, although this requires some backstory first. Prior to dating this particular person I was on a run of, how should i say this, less savoury of sexual adventures in the eyes of my friends. My recent conquests in the bedroom had not exactly measured up to the standards of my closest male compatriots. These started with the end of my previous relationship of 18 months with a girl whom i thought i loved, so being a newly freed man, what else would i do? Sulk? Moan and complain about being lonely? Hell no, I got right back on the horse (literally and figuritively) and persued the opposite sex like it was my job. A year of university in a larger metropolis compared to the city i grew up in provided many an exploit for the memoirs. And upon returning home i was renewed with a swagger and new outlook on life. Back to the original story, a few of the ladies that i had familiar relations with had just returned home from their respective universities and colleges and most were looking to relive their various adventures with me. If any one out there has ever been in a relationship without sex for a prolonged period of time knows that a six or a seven in real life looks a few numbers up on the scale in your sex-deprived brain. Needless to say I was faced with the first real test of temptation that i had experienced in this, my current relationship. The things that helped me through this were the following; I knew that had i done the dirtiest of deeds with these women I would not be impressed and neither would my guy friends, we can all agree that my current girlfriend is a serious babe and an amazing person all rolled up into one. Very seldom do men in my circle of friends happen upon such a person who will show us any kind of interest, so I had the resolve to stick it out, ignore the little man inside of me that wanted to fornicate with everything that i saw. So now we have reached the New Year, 2011, with the old addige that with the new year comes new oppourtunity, for me it was the new oppourtunity to go insane. I have tried to be supportive of my girlfriend and all that she does but i just can't see why she doesnt see my side of things without me having to serve it up to her on a silver platter and usually when i do that im chastized for being inconsiderate of her feelings and failing to be understanding of her situation. Admittedly I am by no means perfect, neither do i expect anyone else to be, but you put any other post pubescent boy in the same situation and I bet 95 out of 100 would running for the hills, and four of the other five would have cheated, once, twice, maybe thrice. But here i stand alone as the one percent, still faithful, still clinging to a hope that eventually everything will go back to the way it was and everyone can live happily ever after until the next time this kind of thing happens again.....But i will let you the reader be the judge of that, am I wrong for sticking around? am I a total idiot? should i be placed in a secret goverment lab and be studied? or am I doing the right thing for society? by attempting to take the pressure off the sexual side of a relationship, in an extremely over-sexualized society I may be alone in this fight........


the plaidbstrd
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